Bring me the head of Barack Obama

When in the course of human events it becomes necessary to draw a line in the sand and say “no more,” well, we do it. Most of us, anyway. We have our limits, our threshold for taste. And there’s always someone willing to go that extra mile, to venture into the territory of the ridiculous. So we don’t have to.

Well, it's happened again. You can’t make this up. Coins and victory plates and action figures are no longer enough. The deification of President Barack Obama has officially entered the realm of the irredeemably inane. From the good folks who brought you Chia Scooby-Doo, please welcome the Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia Obama head, grafting the time-honored Chia Pet principle (water the seed-laced surface for x number of days and watch with wonder as seedlings resemble hair sprout) onto the likeness of the 44th president.

The Chia Obama comes in two, uh, guises? Flavors? There’s a Happy Obama and a Determined Obama. The resemblance to President Obama is arguable; to our eyes the Determined Obama isn’t too bad, but Happy looks like Gene Wilder with a bad rug. No word yet on when Sneezy, Grumpy or Sleepy Obama go on sale.

Each Obama Chia head comes with a seed packet; a pottery planter for the proper display of the nation’s chief executive; a “convenient drip tray” (A clay head needs a drool bucket? Who knew?), and an instruction sheet for the proper care and feeding of the presidential homunculus.

It’s big fun for the whole family, even after the whole family stops laughing. And it’s instructional; use this and teach your children just how far a celebrity-besotted culture in the midst of severe economic crisis will go to keep itself afloat. You can pre-order these bad boys right here.

Orders ship on April 1 — and that fact alone deserves to be some kind of a clue.
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Image credit: chiabarackobama.